Crusades - “Driven”
you guyyyys this band
BEEN SAYIN’ THIS FOR A WHILE.
ps. you can buy this album from us for 10 bux!
Rob Ford, the World’s Greatest Mayor, Has a Terrible Photographer
Rob Ford is a sentient chunk of Spam and the current mayor of Toronto. He also happens to be VICE Canada’s favorite politician, for many reasons. Unfortunately, Rob has been doing a mediocre job at engaging with the kids on social media, and we think we know why: his photographer is awful. While it would behoove the visually clueless political aide Rob has documenting him to read a damn book about the rule of thirds and proper focus, the damage has already been done. Above, you can see one of this photographer’s greater triumphs: Robbie sitting in a flashy McLaren whip, telling his haters that they can’t tell him nothin’. Unfortunately, save for this glorious photo that he has made his Facebook cover image, Rob’s Facebook page is riddled with unflattering portraits.
What the hell is this framing all about? Why are we looking at half of Rob’s rosy face and three-quarters of that seafoam-green vintage Caddy? Is Rob even interested in the Caddy? We could see Rob cruising around the city in this classy vehicle, blaring “Money Ain’t a Thang” and waving at all his gorgeous lady constituents, but please, ask the man to pose for a photo with the car. And what is Rob looking at, anyway? There’s probably something way cooler on the horizon that only Rob can see. Trust this man’s vision.
No! Come on! He doesn’t even have his eyes open and his skin looks like it’s made of bubble gum and ham. Look at the contrast between the shadow on his forehead and the harsh light striking his cheek. His hand looks like it was just stung by an entire wasps’ nest. Plus, he’s in front of some boring ancient vehicle that no one has ever wanted to take a photo beside. Why was this uploaded?
Went to the movies today and pulled a double feature with Looper and Argo. After seeingArgo, all I can say is THANKS CANADA! As if we didn’t already need another reason to think Canada kicks ass. But both movies are good and worth checking out.
Lest anyone think I’m still not watching all the films in The Criterion Collection, well, I am. My latest viewing, “49th Parallel,” combines some of my favorite things: Canada, World War II, and kicking Nazi ass. It’s all done in the thriller genre, or at least as much as that can be done in the early 1940s. There’s an array of actors including Laurence Olivier and Raymond Massey, but the main focus is the devilish Eric Portman. “49th Parallel” also works as an example of anti-isolationism film, aimed at an American audience whose nation had yet to enter World War II. While it can come close to being heavy-handed, it never quite crossed the line, mainly because I like Canada so much.